Wonder If...

Wonder if I will ever get back in the groove of blogging? Its summer now. I am relieved for the break from homeschooling. It was a good year, but especially at the end it dragged on forever. I guess after April 3rd, my heart just was no longer in it.

Wonder if it will ever feel real that my precious and loving Daddy is not still limping around on this earth. Still can't believe he is not around for me to pick up the phone and call. Even more I am not used to going so long without him calling to check in and see how I, the kids and Kurt are doing. I will forever treasure that last phone conversation. About an hour and a half before the accident, we talked for about 25 minutes. It was a typical conversation. He asked about every family member, teased me a little, discussed the latest events including his activities of the morning and his plans for the next day. Easter. Celebrating our risen Savior. I think that Daddy did that every day anyway. I know he did that day. He celebrated and saw Him face to face. I am jealous of both of them; Daddy for seeing Jesus face to face, and Jesus for seeing Daddy face to face. I miss the gentle strength that shone on his face every time I ever saw it.

I remember feeling like the world should have stopped spinning when I heard the news that Daddy was gone; like the Sun should have gone out---flipped like a light switch. It didn't. And the world continues to spin, seemingly out of control. But I must acknowledge that it is not out of control. And that I do have hope because I know Who holds the future in His hands. Just like he holds Me and mine. Even now I know, in my heart of hearts that He never left my Daddy nor forsook him. In the very moment that the woman in the truck crossed over the double line--- slamming into his car, killing him instantly---he slammed right into the arms of His Jesus, the one he had spent the morning introducing others to.

Wonder if it will be very long before Jesus returns to take the rest of us home with Him?

Wonder how many of the people with whom I cross paths on a daily basis are actually ready to meet Him? And I wonder how I might better pray and/or speak to help point them to Him.

He is God, and He is Good. All the time.

Leisl